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Sunday, March 5 (continued)
In the meantime, Mr Thick went with our son to the nursery to be cleaned up and he later recounted to me that our little man stayed alert throughout, looking calmly at his surroundings.

When I came to, I was in a ward and Mr Thick was with me. The nurses bustled around me, making sure I was comfortable, before leaving us alone. And as we drifted off into sleep, Mr Thick sitting next to me, he held my hand. Every time a shivering fit hit me, I would grab hold of his hand and he would squeeze back gently in return.

At 6am, a nurse brought Aidan in and asked if I wanted to try breastfeeding him. I said yes and amid the shivers, I put him to my breast and he started suckling like a champ. After a while, they took him back and as my shivers subsided, I fell back asleep.

Two hours later, Dr Y came in to check on me. He explained that the umbilical cord had wound itself around Aidan’s neck and every time Aidan tried to descend, it must have tightened and caused his heart rate to fall. The cord was also thin and short, which explained why he wasn’t able to descend at all. If the cord had been longer and thicker, it might still have been possible for him to be born vaginally.

The aftermath
Immediately after the birth and for the two days after, I had problems falling and staying asleep. Whenever I drifted into slumberland, my body would jerk uncontrollably, waking me up. Or I would dream of falling off from a cliff and wake myself up. I suppose my body had taken a toll and these were the repercussions.

Thankfully, my recovery from the Caesarean was smoother and quicker than expected. By noon on the day of Aidan’s birth, the glucose IV drip was removed from my hand and I was drinking milo. The nurses also removed my catheter and I was able to get up and walk to the toilet to pee that same evening.

The following days were a bit tough, especially in the mornings when I got out of bed and the wound hurt like crazy. But I was determined not to stay in bed and tried to walk around as much as I could. By Wednesday, I was walking out to the nursery to see my little man, albeit hunched like a wizened grandmother walking at a snail’s pace.

When I got home on Thursday, the pain had all but subsided, save for a few twinges now and then. I was just so happy to be home, I think, that the pain was erased from my mind.

Unfortunately, Aidan developed jaundice while we were in the hospital but that is another story for another day. We have been trying to get him settled down and while the first night was extremely trying – he had crying bouts from 230am to 730am – we are both doing the best that we could.

So yes, the birth went nothing like we had planned. It was everything I didn’t want. A Caesarean, however unpleasant, was necessary in our case and I have accepted this as our birth experience. More importantly, Aidan is fine, and so am I. And that’s all that really matters.

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