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The rise of the metrosexual

I am vain.
I love clothes. And shoes. And bags. And lip gloss. And shiny hair.
I spend way too much on things I don’t need but covet desperately.
But I accept that this is a universal maxim – you are woman, therefore you are vain.
It’s almost as if women are meant to be vain and particular about the way they look. It’s become a social norm, a convention, a rule.
Men?
You’d be grateful if they wash their faces with facial cleanser instead of shampoo and wear matching socks.

Well, not anymore.
The way ST looks at it, men are increasingly taking more care of their appearances, sometimes even rivaling the girls.

It’s a social horror movie acting out in front of my very eyes.
On the one hand, I wouldn’t want my man to look like he hasn’t bathed for 10 days and wears polo tees tucked into his tightly-cinched jeans, complete with NS sports shoes. No no no.
But on the other hand, I wouldn’t want him to paint his nails, wear diamonds on his earlobes (give them to me instead) and spend hundreds of dollars on shopping every month (spend them on me!), let alone go for manicures, pedicures and facials.

Scary.
Would any girl actually want to date a man who is as vain as, if not more, herself?
The fear of rejection would be too great, the feeling of not meeting up to expectations would suffocate.

Hence, it comes as a (comic) relief when a conversation with a male friend, who wishes to remain anonymous, yields the following (in his actual words):

This is shopping, the male way.

1. Shoes got hole in the sole. Think to myself: ok I need new shoes. Think: ok Bugis got sale. Target: go Bugis.

2. Computer at work got problem needs time to fix. Think: ok better go Bugis today since got excuse to leave early – buy my shoes before sale over.

3. Go Bugis. Head straight for the shoe section. Try out one shoe. Ok not bad. Try out another shoe. ok comfortable. Ok BUY. Time taken: 10 mins from the time I entered the Seiyu.

4. Ok need socks. Head for sock section. Get socks. Buy. Time taken: 5 mins.

5. Think: ok I’m outdoors. Let’s get all my grocery sh** done at one go so I dun have to buy any stuff for weeks. Head to Carrefour. Grab shopping trolley.

6. Buy longlasting groceries like milk powder, big tin of milo etc. Shampoo, toothbrush etc. Weighs a ton. Take taxi. Go home.

Time spent: 3 hours. Money spent: $230″

Bravo, here’s a true Singaporean man!
He needs a girlfriend.
Any takers?

What’s Playing on iTunes
Let Down from “OK Computer” by Radiohead

10 thoughts on “The rise of the metrosexual”

  1. my idea of new shirts ?

    going giodarno buy their entire range of $6 t shirts to replenish the old ones 😛

    viola, a “new” wardrobe !

    super convenient…i can wear them :

    1) for soccer/gym
    2) for going to the movies
    3) to sleep

    hahahha
    nice?

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  2. ya i read the article on ST too. i haven gone for a facial/manicure/pedicure in my 23 years and they go monthly. on the other hand, if i date a metrosexual, i might get to go for free hahaha

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  3. hey u got it wrong man…
    this guy is no Singaporean man, he’s our friendly neighbour and abang from across the Causeway, and claims to live in a tree.

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  4. Ok, I can understand the horrors of a man wearing NS track shoes everywhere he goes, even when he has already got his pink ic. But the idea of polo tees tucked into jeans is a fashion crime by itself? Wat’s wrong with being prim and proper? A conventional polo’s shirt tail is so lengthy that u have to tuck into ur pants/jeans or risk being mistaken for a construction worker or a wannabe rapper. Or maybe being unkempt is the new rage nowadays. Hmmm…..

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  5. what’s wrong with shopping? shopping’s cool. but you gotta know what you wanna buy first before shopping lar. not like girls like dat… heheheh ouch hey! *ducks barrage of abuse from females*

    i’d never wear a polo shirt with jeans… come to think of it, i haven’t worn a polo tee in years! lol

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  6. Dawna – Well, to keep his identity anonymous, I couldn’t say that the writer is a Malaysian tenor who is a lawyer practising in Singapore, right?

    Zoolander – maybe wearing polo tee with jeans on its own is not a crime but my description goes beyond that. As for unkempt, well, if you got the look, anything would look good on you, I suppose.

    Hucks – the fun in shopping is that you never know what you are going to get. A warped version of Murphy’s Law is that if you set out to buy what you intend to buy, you will never buy it. Ar least for us girls, anyway. 😛

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  7. yann: is a bimbo.

    ash: i’m sure it was a matter of practicality. One stop shop to get all his needs.

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