This is awful.
Everywhere I read, everyone is talking about what surprises they think their boyfriends are going to give them, the 99 roses that was sent to them and the fancy dinner they will be having at night. Why are they so willing to give in to the foolish event called “Valentine’s Day?”
Here I am, ready to go to bed after tuition, and the boyfriend is on his way home from work. No celebrations, zilch, zip, nada. In fact, I can’t really recall the last time I received flowers from him. But even if we had gone out to celebrate, we would most likely have ended up in Changi Villge, or the like, savouring a plate of nasi lemak each. That’s just the kind of couple that we are.
And as I write, I am also contemplating the other meaning that Valentine’s Day had during my school days. Back then, it was Friendship Day and the choir mates would all have a ball of a time in school.
Sadly, as I grow older, I find myself having a more cynical view of life and friendships. I used to love going for choir practices because of the friends I had made. But in recent times, I observe that certain people, whom I used to think were pals of mine, were turning out to be nothing more than empty acquaintances. Friends make time and effort for one another, that’s a given. My motto is that if you cannot be bothered to expend some energy on maintaining the friendship, then I am not going to waste my time on you either. If you are so easily like the rats following Pied Piper, then go ahead and run off headlong into the river.
There will always be people whom you try to care for, and who never seem to be there for you when you are in need. Toxic friends like these are to be ruthlessly weeded out and thrown into the bins.
Also, do not try to foist emotional blackmail off on me, like “I want to be your friend but am too proud to ask” and then do actions that clearly indicate the opposite. Others may believe, but I don’t and I am not interested in anyone who is keen on changing my mind. If you were never there for me when I was broken and in tears, then you can jolly well forget about me offering you the olive branch. I did that once and received no affirmation and that’s the only chance you will ever get.
Am I heartless? Perhaps. But I would rather have a few friends close by my side than to have meaningless relationships with others whom I can only hang out with, but not confide in.