Foolish

When I saw her, I was rather taken aback by her demeanour. She had always struck me as the strong, dependable type, able to execute whatever actions that needed to be done in order for things to progress, no matter how hard it is.

But now, she was visibly unhappy, her eyes often lacking that spark – be it laughing or determined – that I had grown used to.

And as we sat in that bustling eating place, it all tumbled out. How he was not making enough effort in the relationship, how she felt she had changed ever since her move from Singapore, how she had broken down and cried many times despite herself, how he was insensitive to her needs and feelings, how he chosen to run instead of trying to make it all work out.

And I wondered, why?

She clearly deserved better, and yet she was struggling to keep the thin fabric of love from unravelling. Was her effort in vain? Only time would tell.

But one thing is clear, this is not supposed to be the way it is. Young love should be free and full of joy and passion, not full of questions and doubt and incriminations.

There was nothing I could do but to give her a hug and wish her well as she went along her way, a path she had clearly chosen for herself.

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Is marriage a means of pledging commitment or a noose around one’s neck? Perhaps it all boils down to a stark difference in perception.

An engagement could be a means to the end, a culmination of decisions and actions. But that is only if the two parties involved have the same ideas on what the term engagement means, and how long the journey would take.

Obviously, it does not bode well when one party envisions tying the knot in the near future while the other is thinking of taking it slow and easy, with no intention of kickstarting the planning process, with no sign of the ring that would signify a change in status.

Is it so hard to communicate then? To exchange ideas and opinions?

Because when two have such differing views, the idea of marriage becomes a stone that weighs your every step, preventing you for exploring the playground beyond your shared world.

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What is it about love that makes fools out of you and I?

In that case, my old friend Nise must be an ecstatic fool since she has just received a huge rock on her finger. Congratulations to her and Joe, her studly macho army man! Knowing what they have gone through to be together, it’s only fitting that their story has a fairy tale ending.