Many things have happened this week and it’s made me sit back and ponder for a bit.
The work week didn’t start well. Monday was excruciating and I was terribly unproductive. Calls to my sources went unanswered, information promised to me was not forthcoming, my deadlines were looming and I had writer’s block.
Later, I wrote a revealing story about how political and economic instability is hurting a fantastic Thai agency. It felt awful to paint a bleak picture when they are clearly one of the most creative agencies in Asia, and also because my subject was so forthright, warm and articulate. It made me feel guilty for filing the story.
But I picked up two important Indonesian scoops today and that mitigated everything because Jakarta is one of the hardest markets to crack. The rush of adrenalin was overpowering and I suddenly felt good about myself again.
The moral(s) of the story is: Plod on when the going gets tough and the tough really gets going. And I should never doubt my abilities.
Today has been a day of girlfriend bonding.
I first met up with Denise for lunch and I’m amazed at how gorgeous my old friend looks. We’ve known each since we were 13 and she’s still the same old silly, funny and warm character.
We marvelled at how we could pick things up from where we had left off almost two years ago, and how our conversation has steered from boys and exams to marriages and CPF housing loans.
I’m happy that she and Joseph are finally tying the knot and that she has invited me to be a part of it. It’s been quite a journey for them – they were studying in Australia and the US respectively – and they’ve held on steadfastly. And even though her working environment is less than satisfactory, she has gritted her teeth to get through the past two years.
It’s been almost 10 years since we left the school at Emerald Hill (well, Dunearn Road, actually) and it’s nice to know she is still the same old Denise from 4/4.
In the evening, I met Ash, who has just returned from Japan. Together with Popartgirl, we marched on to Wacha for dinner. Unfortunately, tonight’s Japanese food was a tad underwhelming.
As we sat down and chatted during dinner and over french fries later, it dawned on me how we have all changed and yet are still the same. Ash said she has changed during her two years abroad even though she looked and sounded the same to me.
As she explained how she has had to cope with being alone in a foreign land, how she had to come home when she finally felt settled, how she had to leave her boyfriend behind because she was coming home, it made me look at her in a different light. Ash is a toughie and when she confesses to crying at night, it really means something.
But she knows she has to move on somehow and she is making the effort and I feel proud of her. Because I know she will deal with this, just like she has always dealt with her problems.
Popartgirl herself hasn’t been feeling great ever since Joker left for further studies. I know it’s hard for her and I have tried to rally around her but understandably, nothing comes close to having him around physically.
Still, I think she is holding up well and hey, 1.5 years will fly by! And we can make our way to New York and celebrate Christmas together in the wintry cold.
There’s so much to learn in life and I feel really humbled when I am around people like them. Would I be able to deal with a long-distance relationship? Would I have the courage to bid farewell to the man I love, knowing that I will never be with him?
Maybe it’s just the way the world is, we all face the same problems at one time or another.
Maybe I am stronger than I think I am.
What was that again?
I should never doubt my abilities.