The Body

I love being pregnant.

I am at this stage where I am mobile, the bump is manageably compact and my appetite is roaring. I can run low on sleep – that’s what marrying a bulldozer snoring man does to you – and still function normally.

But even I got to admit that my body is changing beyond my imagination and that I need to take things a notch slower. It’s sad but true: the nugget is holding my body hostage and everything that I am and do now is all because of him.

I have been woken up by my body at 4am because of heartburn.
My feet cramp up almost everyday, thankfully before and NOT DURING bedtime.
My skin and hair are as dry as the Sahara desert.
My eyes are woefully dry and my vision has deteriorated to the point where I can’t even make out the numbers of approaching buses.
Come nighttime, my sleep stays light and my brains conjure up vivid dreams that feel oh so real but fade away when daylight arrives.
My nose is stuffed up and it gets hard to breathe at night.
My calves ache and my legs feel like the day after a 10km race.
I have the appetite of a full-grown man.
Sometimes, even brisk walking can make me feel breathless.
When I sit on the floor to play with my cats, I often need Mr Thick’s help to get up and off.
My body creaks and groans when I carry heavy objects or bend down.

And when I see pictures of myself pre-pregnancy, it startles me because I have completely forgotten how I used to look like. And that’s really, really scary. And just as scary is when the numbers of the digital weighing machine creep up. Clearly, I have expected the weight gain but it’s still unnerving to see a large 45 flash at me when it’s something I have never seen before in my life (I’m really petite).

My body, really, is no longer mine.

But when I feel my little man nudge me from within, these fleeting moments of OHMYGAWD disappear, only to be replaced by an intense love and affection for this tiny hostage taker. Yes, having crampy feet sucks. Yes, to suddenly discard 99% of your wardrobe is a little saddening. Yes, not being able to see clearly is worrying (what if it’s permanent?). Yes, looking into the mirror these days can be a little disconcerting.

Would I trade all these in to get my body back?

HELL NO.

It’s only temporary and part and parcel of being pregnant so I’m just going to embrace all that it entails, warts and all.

Afterall, I am NEVER going to be pregnant with the nugget again, isn’t it? Every pregnancy and every birth is a once in a lifetime event so might as well cherish it and go with the flow.