Motherhood, The organised chaos

Somebody fix me, please

I’m afraid that I am broken.

I spent much of Friday in dark thoughts and sobbing with my crying baby, who just could not stay asleep, no matter what I did. In the end, I cuddled him and he slept on my chest for two hours.

And then I headed over to the in-laws’ for dinner and all it took was thoughtless and insensitive words spoken and the waterworks begun all over again. I hid in the bathroom as tears rolled down my cheeks. I needed help and I texted the first person I could think of: my godsister.

When I came home, I headed straight for the bathroom and continued sobbing.

Something’s clearly broken inside me and I need to put myself back together again.

I’m afraid that like Humpty Dumpty, all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put me together again.

But I will be fine.

This, too, shall pass.